Wellbeing | Moodscapes and walking routes

A good walk can cure many an ill but picking the best walk for your state of mind can have powerful effects and for those in need of calm, looking to relieve stress or anxiety or to boost creativity, a walk alongside a lake might be just the walking prescription you need.

Nowhere is as lavishly light as a lake, partly thanks to the sun glitter created when sun hits the surface of clean water. Sun glitter is made up of thousands of tiny glints, each caused by a splinter of sunbeam reflecting at exactly the right angle to send light to our eyes. As the water moves with the breeze or slight current, the glitter pattern changes, providing endless light and visual stimulation.
Morning light holds an abundance of blue, which helps shut down lingering melatonin that can make us feel drowsy and muddle-headed in the morning. Recent studies show that light also blunts the amygdala, the threat-detection centre that activates our fight or flight system. When we’re in the grip of chronic stress or anxiety, light quietens our amygdala. Bright light can also improve concentration and memory – neuroscientists think that our brain evolved to learn during daylight hours.
So, for energy and mood boosting blue-wave light, take your lakeside walk in the morning. However. sun glitter is also spectacular at the end of the day when light beams create glitter in shades of crimson, pink, amber and gold – telling our body it’s time to wind down. Moonlight on still water creates its own moon glitter, well worth seeking out for its mysterious elegance.
Research has demonstrated the importance of rhythmic movement for alleviating anxiety and depression and studies of older people have found that rhythmic walking not only improves physical health (muscle strength, balance and flexibility) but also quality of life.
We know that walking more briskly reduces our chance of cancer, heart disease, dementia and osteoporosis. When we move briskly, our brain produces the molecule known as brain-derived-neurotrophic factor (BDNF), a protein that promotes the growth of new neurons. BDNF appears to help recovery from depression and stress and the brisker the movement the more BDNF we produce. Picking up the pace also helps us to sleep better and turns a walk into a bone-building bonanza.

The above extract is from The Walking Cure: Harness The Lifechanging Power Of Landscape To Heal, Energise And Inspire by Annabel Streets (Bloomsbury Tonic). You can read a longer extract in our April issue, in shops now.

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Wellbeing | Say 'Sorry' Well

Illustration by Anneliese Klos

Knowing how to make a good apology is good for both the giver and the receiver of the ‘sorry’

Whether you have regrets you wish to make amends for, or simply want to express solidarity and sympathy for a no-blame situation, knowing ‘how’ to apologise well is key. Sorry might be the hardest word but giving it your all and doing it properly can make it feel so much easier and hopefully allow both parties to move on positively. Here are a few things to bear in mind before you begin…

• Avoid over-use of “sorry”. The habitual “I’m sorry” detracts from meaningful and needed apologies.

• Ask for the other person’s perspective and listen to it. Understanding their point of view can help you to both make sense of the situation.

• Forget about blame and whose fault it is or was; an apology needn’t be an admission of guilt.

• Show empathy by making it about the other person, not you. “I realise that something has upset you, and I’m sorry.”

• Use an apology as an opportunity for positive change rather than simply as a plea for forgiveness.

• Make any intentions to change as concrete and as realistic as possible.

The advice above is taken from our feature, ‘Making Amends’ by Rebecca Frank in our March issue.

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Wellbeing | Eye Spy Glimmers

If winter is wintering a little too long for your liking, start spotting glimmers to get you
through until spring.

We went on a Glimmer Hunt in our February issue, noticing the small things that make us feel safe and calm. One of the things we loved most was the idea of compiling a Glimmer Library; a list in a notebook, on your phone or just in your head of the glimmers you have seen to refer back to when you need a boost. To help get you started with your Glimmer Library, we’ve collated a few glimmers here that you might like to spot this month…

• Snowdrops in full bloom

• Sticky buds on trees

• The smell of fresh lemons on pancakes

• The sound of rain on your roof when you’re cosy inside

• A perfectly formed spider web

• Sinking into a bed with new sheets on

• Tea in your favourite mug

• The crackle of logs on a fire

• Suddenly noticing how light the evenings are

• Winter birdsong

See how many of our Eye Spy Glimmers you can spot this month and add more of your own as you notice them to create your Glimmer Library. 

You can read more about seeking out glimmers in our feature by Lottie Storey in our February issues, which is in shops now. Buy this month's The Simple Things - buy, download or subscribe

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How To | Slow Your Pace

Winter calls us to slow down, but this is no mean feat when there’s so much noise about productivity and stacks of stimulation, not to mention bulging to-do lists. There’s a difference between slowing down and grinding to a halt. Try any of the following ways to gently alter your pace:

• Slow smooth exhalations

• Repeat: “I have all the time I need”

• Chew your food slowly and deliberately

• Take, and notice, slow, steady steps

• Turn up your listening skills

• Green-gaze out of the window

• Take regular screen breaks

• Have slow hugs

The above extract is taken from Self-care For Winter: Seven Steps To Thriving In The Colder Months
by Suzy Reading (Aster). You can read more in our January issue.

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Wellbeing | Coping with Hard Times

Christmas can feel tough when you’re missing someone special. Here are a few simple ways to make life a little easier

Treat yourself
Perhaps it’s a bright scarf, a soft blanket or a hot water bottle, anything that makes you feel comforted and joyful.

Ask yourself what you need
Reach out to those who care about you. Ask for help, some company or a hug.

Be mindful of social media
Scrolling through pictures of ‘perfect’ Christmases isn’t helpful if you’re not feeling your best.

Pass on kindness
Do something for someone else who might be finding it hard, too.

Allow yourself to be sad
Try not to use busyness as a way to avoid the feelings.

The advice above is taken from our feature ‘Comfort and Joy’ by Rebecca Frank in our December issue and is all about how to care for yourself on difficult Christmases.

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Wellbeing | Feeding the Mind

Supporting your gut microbiome will provide your brain with the nutrients it needs to function well, enabling you to think faster and clearer.

Studies have shown links between higher levels of good bacteria and improvement in learning new information and problem solving. Neurotransmitters such as serotonin and dopamine are produced in the gut to help with digestive function while also having an indirect effect on the part of the brain that influences mood, appetite and energy.

“The focus is shifting from the brain to the gut as we learn that it’s not just about how our brain affects our body but how our gut can,” says Dr Emily Leeming, dietitian, microbiome scientist and author of new book Genius Gut. “There’s a growing understanding of how important the gut-brain connection is in health and disease, where disruptions in the gut can manifest as symptoms in the brain and vice versa.” For example, 80% of people with Parkinson’s disease also have constipation, a symptom which can appear as much as 20 years earlier than other warning signs.

The simplest and most effective way to ensure a healthy microbiome is to feed your gut with more of the foods that it loves and less of those that can deplete the good bacteria. A healthy microbiome isn’t about “a specific nutrient or individual meal or weekend reset, but thinking about the bigger picture and a way of eating that you can sustain,” says Emily. It’s about eating more of the good stuff and reducing the less good, ideally without rules or restrictions.

This extract is from our feature ‘Inside Out’ from our October issue, in which Rebecca Frank looks into the ways in which helping our digestion can improve our wellbeing.

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Wellbeing | Glimmer Hunting

This is a wonderful exercise for tuning in and noticing the good stuff happening around us – the joy, the beauty, and the sparks. It builds curiosity and helps us to slow down.

• Practise this anywhere, but it’s best done outside if you can.

• Take time to look around you and then look a little longer and deeper. Notice what you see, hear, and how you feel. Look left, right, up, down and all around. Then linger and just watch what is happening. If you see something that catches your eye, pause and notice. It can take several minutes for something to reveal itself but there will be a small glimmer waiting to be harvested.

• Write down what you found in a notebook. Over time, if you practise this, you’ll build a list of glimmers that you can return to when you need them. Or just enjoy your glimmer and move on, knowing that such moments can be fleeting.

Finding Glimmers is just one of the exercises in using creativity to soothe mind and body taken from the book Creative First Aid by Caitlin Marshall and Lizzie Rose (Murdoch Books), which we have an extract from in our June issue.

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Wellbeing | How not to say 'Sorry'

Sorry to bother, but we just wondered whether you find yourself apologising too often. No worries at all if you don’t have time to think about this…

If you recognise that you regularly use apologetic language, pause and take a moment to read back over your emails or messages before you press send, and tweak them to ensure that you’re not devaluing your needs.

Positive psychology practitioner and coach, Ruth Cooper-Dickson says we should also take a moment before responding if somebody asks something of us, especially if it’s a colleague, client or even a friend who we always say yes to. This is obviously easier if the request comes in by email or text message, but if you’re speaking directly, you could simply say that you need to check your workload or diary, and you’ll get back to them as soon as you can.

Ruth says: “Be honest and assertive, sometimes you really do need to put yourself first.” My own experiences of over-apologising led to me write a novel appropriately entitled No Worries If Not! (HarperNorth) about one woman’s mission to stop saying sorry. And while I never use that phrase to sign off emails any more, I know I still apologise when I needn’t.

The key is not to beat yourself up over it. As Ruth says, self-compassion is about recognising when we over apologise, but being kind to ourselves when we slip up. She said: “Instead of hitting ourselves over the head with the proverbial stick when we catch ourselves needlessly apologising, we should see it as a learning exercise and move on.” Besides, as Charlotte finds out in my book, sometimes there is a place for an apology. Do it less often and it can pack a much greater punch.

This was an extract from our wellbeing feature ‘Sorry Not Sorry’ from our May issue. Read more about why we tend to over-apologise and how to stop from page 48.

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How to | Be More Curious-Minded

Having a mind that’s more open to new ideas and differing opinions to your own can have a positive effect on your wellbeing. Here are a few ways to open your mind a little more

Whether it’s our political leanings, religious beliefs, views on animal rights or vaccinations, most of us have strong opinions on what we consider right or wrong, important or not. And while it’s good to have your own views and live a life that’s true to your values, what are your feelings towards those who don’t have the same opinion? Would you listen and respect their viewpoint or be more inclined to disregard them because they’re not like you?

• To really understand someone else’s views, try repeating them as if they were your own and see what it feels like.

• Reflect on your own opinions and views – where did they originate? When you peel back the layers, what’s at the root?

• Practise looking at the world through the eyes of others. Try to imagine yourself physically in the other person’s position, looking at you. Or imagine someone looking at both of you. This makes it easier to step out of your own mental world and consider a different stance.

• Model kind, empathetic behaviour and you will encourage others to do so, too.

• Try not to group people. We all carry prejudices, often without realising – when you notice yourself doing it, pause and question your assumptions.

The extract above is from our feature ‘To Be Fair…’ by Rebecca Frank in our April issue. You can read more about how being curious-minded can improve your wellbeing from page 54.

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Wellbeing | Slowing Down

There are plenty of lessons we can learn from nature, but one of the most important is that nature is never in a rush

There’s a valuable lesson for most of us here as we hurry around from one task to another, rarely taking time to pause and reflect. We’re increasingly impatient, seeking instant gratification. We’ve lost the ability to be bored, to idle away an afternoon feels wasteful and indulgent.

Yet this downtime is part of our cycle just as it is in the natural world. We too need time to germinate, grow and produce, followed by fallow periods of rest and rejuvenation. Often the expectation is that we spend most or all our time in the productive stage, but if we don’t take time to find new inspiration and let our minds wander, we soon end up burnt out or stuck in a creative rut.

Neuroscientists now understand what happens in our brain when we stop and do nothing and have found that this is when creative and intuitive thinking happens. Rather than filling your time with more stuff to do and rushing to finish so you can move on to the next thing, allow yourself some time to do nothing and let your mind wander. Often you’ll find that your best ideas or solutions spring into your conscious mind when daydreaming.

Lie down on a rug and look at the sky for a while and see what thoughts arise. Try to be patient and let events in your life take their natural course as they do in nature. Plant some seeds and observe how with daily watering and sunlight they slowly grow into seedlings and plants producing fruit, vegetables or flowers. Slow down and observe, listen, reflect, and ponder. In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, ‘Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.’

The words above are an extract from our wellbeing editor’s new book Just Add Nature by
Rebecca Frank (National Trust Books, out 11 April).

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Wellbeing | Keep the Ability to Sleep Well

Whether it’s having 20:20 vision or being able to touch your toes, it can come as a shock when the things you’ve always found easy don’t feel quite so effortless any more.

Now we’re living longer, it’s more important than ever that we take steps to protect and maintain the health of our brains and bodies, and it’s more within our control than you might think.

DON’T LOSE SLEEP

You’ve slept through since you were a baby but then stop being able to fall asleep easily and 4am becomes your new wake-up time. Denise Iordache, sleep specialist and therapist at joyspacetherapy. com says, “A primary contributor to change in sleep patterns in middle age is hormone fluctuations. Oestrogen plays a crucial role in regulating sleep patterns and its reduction may lead to disturbances in the sleep/wake cycle.” Throw in hot flushes, night sweats and anxiety and bedtime can start to feel like a nightmare. Production of melatonin, the sleep hormone, also decreases with age and blue light has been shown to affect melatonin levels. Lifestyle circumstances that increase stress levels can also cause sleep disturbance, including career demands, financial worries, care-giving responsibilities and so on. “Mental health factors such as anxiety or depression may become more prevalent during this life stage, further impacting sleep quality,” says Denise.

KEEP GOOD SLEEP HABITS

Establishing a consistent sleep routine by going to bed and waking up at the same time every day, even on weekends, will help. A calming bedtime, free of stimulants, will also signal to the body that it’s time to wind down. Swapping blue light exposure from the TV, iPad and other devices for a mellow yellow lighting from lamps, candles or a fire before bed also helps to increase melatonin and can make you feel sleepy. “Another tailored approach involves mindful stress management,” says Denise. “Deep breathing, meditation, mindfulness practices or gentle yoga before bed promotes a more tranquil transition into sleep.” Spicy foods, caffeine and alcohol can all disrupt sleep. Instead, opt for sleep supportive foods like a warm milky drink, magnesium-rich nuts or melatonin-producing cherries.

This extract was taken from our feature ‘Use It Or Lose It’ by Rebecca Frank from our January issue. You can read more, including how to keep your balance, memory, confidence, sight, strength and flexibility from page 84. The January issue is in shops now, or you can buy it from our online store and have it delivered to your door.

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Wellbeing | How to let go of Being Busy

As the trees shed their leaves, and everything is laid a little bare, can we take something from their example and let go of our ‘busyness’ too?

Are you always ‘busy’? Do you find it hard to relax? Do you worry about letting people and yourself down if you’re not on top of everything?

Dr Meg Arroll, author of Tiny Traumas (Thorsons), identifies these as symptoms of high-functioning anxiety or ‘busy-itis’ in which we keep constantly busy, often to distract ourselves from anxious thoughts. Judith Kleinman, Alexander Technique teacher and author of Finding Quiet Strength (Quickthorn) says that this can be especially true for women when we have had to juggle so many responsibilities and “find it hard to let go of these mental burdens as though everything might fall apart if we don’t worry about it all the time.”

Letting go

Overcome the urge to multi-task and create chunks of time where you can concentrate on just one thing in order to prevent mental fatigue and brain fog.

“Finding a balance of work, rest and play is so important and easy to forget when we are conscientious, helpful people,” says Kleinman. “However, if we can shift our motivational goals to include enjoying simple things like sleeping enough, drinking plenty of water, eating well and being with friends and family, research shows that we will be more effective in our work life balance.”

Doing some physical exercise can also help to manage feelings of stress. If you’ve got a stressful event that day, do something that makes your heart pump for around 20 minutes and the calming effect will last for hours.

These ideas for being less busy are from our wellbeing feature ‘Letting Go’ in our October issue by Rebecca Frank, which is full of wise advice on ways to let go of whatever is holding you back.

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Wellbeing | UK Spa Towns

Thinking of taking the waters? There are around 50 towns associated with springs in the UK, some remaining active, some very much gone to ground. However, these are still well worth a visit.

BATH Take a tour around the Roman Baths, bathe in the geothermal waters at the Thermae Spa and taste the waters in the Pump Room in this World Heritage city.

BUXTON Restore yourself at the luxuriously restored Buxton Crescent Hotel. You can also explore Poole’s Cavern, and sip the water straight from St Ann’s Well in England’s highest market town on the edge of the Peak District.

CHELTENHAM Enjoy the Austen-like atmosphere of this Cotswolds-edge town, renowned for its Regency architecture. Unfortunately, you can’t bathe in or drink the waters these days, however, the Pittville Pump Room, overlooking picturesque Pittville Park, still remains and Cheltenham itself is awash with culture.

DROITWICH SPA Priding itself on being the only saltwater spa town in the UK, its waters come directly from brine springs and contain 30% natural salts – making them ten times more concentrated than sea water. Visit during the summer and you can bob around in the saltwater lido.

HARROGATE Crescent Gardens holds the main attractions, including The Royal Pump Room (housing Europe’s strongest sulphur well, alongside a museum). Nowadays it’s not advised to drink the water.

MALVERN Most of Malvern’s many historic hydrotherapy hotels were converted into schools when the spa industry collapsed. However you can still drink the water: pick up a map from the tourist office and sip from the many spouts and fountains.

The above spa town suggestions are taken from our feature Healing Waters in our September issue. You can read the whole feature from page 52.

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Wellbeing | Exercise your laughter muscle

Try this simple laughter exercise from Melissa at Big LoLz

1 Find a quiet, comfortable space where you won’t be disturbed.

2 Stand up and take a few deep breaths. Shake off any tension or stress that you may be feeling and allow your body to completely relax.

3 Fake it until you make it. Start with a small chuckle and gradually increase the intensity. It may feel forced at first, but that’s okay.

4 If you’re struggling, try repeating phrases like “ho ho ha ha” or “ha ha hee hee” while laughing. Experiment with different sounds and variations to find what feels most natural to you.

5 Notice how your mind tries to get in the way. Don’t worry about how you sound or look; just focus on fully embracing the joyful feeling that laughter brings.

6 Keep going. Sustain the laughter for several minutes. Allow it to build and continue without forcing it. If the laughter subsides, bring it back by using the laughter prompts again.

7 Relax and enjoy. Gradually reduce the intensity of laughter and take a couple of moments to breathe deeply and enjoy all of the benefits of the practice.

This exercise is meant to be playful and enjoyable, so don’t be afraid to really let go and have fun with it! If you’d like to try a laughter yoga class, find out more about Melissa and Holly’s workshops on Insta: @energetics.explained or at energeticsexplained.com.

The laughter exercise above is from our August issue feature, ‘Looking for LOLs’, which is all about rediscovering your laughter.

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Learn | The Art of Gentle Activism

Turning anger into something positive is good for your wellbeing as well as for your cause. If you feel strongly about making the world a better place, here are a few groups that are protesting gently and creatively, that might inspire you.

CRAFTIVISM
Sarah Corbett of Craftivist Collective was a conventional activist for 30 years before setting up this group, whose members use “beautiful crafted works to help themselves and encourage others to be the change they want to see in the world.” Pick a project you’d like to work on, from barbie doll activists to stitched messages on hankies, and work individually or as a group while connecting with other craftivist members.

RIGHT TO ROAM
Join the campaign for greater access to our land and waterways. There are lots of ways to get involved, from joining peaceful protests and trespass events to checking and recording the rights of way in your area. Check out righttoroam.org.uk for updates and details of future events. Recent changes to the law that prohibited wild camping in Dartmoor are under appeal following protests and campaigns (insta: @thestarsareours.uk), proving that change can happen. Check out the Scottish Outdoor Access Code to see what responsible nature access looks like (since 2003, people in Scotland have had access rights to most land and inland water): outdooraccess-scotland.scot, while greenandblackcross.org has info on protest and trespass laws.

GUERRILLA GARDENING
Plant and grow in public spaces to transform local areas, empower communities, support our ecosystem and make a statement about public access to common land and nature. Guerrilla gardeners plant and maintain scraps of neglected land such as grass verges, street tree beds, car parks, roundabouts and so on 

TRASH-FREE TRAILS
Never mind leave no trace, the trash-free trails mission is to leave a positive trace by clearing rubbish as you walk/run/cycle. Join the community of litter pickers, document your route and your haul, and take satisfaction in reporting your trail clean at the end. It’s a great way to combine nature and exercise with making a positive contribution. Visit trashfreetrails.org for info.

INCREDIBLE EDIBLE
Help turn disused plots of land into growing patches to supply the community with fresh, locally grown food. What started with a couple of friends in Todmorden, West Yorkshire, in 2008, has grown to over 100 groups across the UK. Their motto is ‘If you eat, you’re in.’ If you want to join up or start your own, see incredibleedible.org.uk for details – and watch Pam Warhurst’s TED talk for inspiration.

YARN BOMBING
If you’re a dab hand with knitting needles you could have a lot of fun joining a yarn bombing group. They create knitted and crocheted works of art to appear in public places, often to draw attention to an issue but sometimes just for decoration and to raise awareness of the craft. Some groups also create knitted products for charities and events. See if there are any guerrilla knitters in your area and, if not, see how much interest there is. All you need are a few people and a pile of wool.

The above ideas were taken from our feature The Power of Gentle Protest by Rebecca Frank in our July issue. You can read more from page 47.

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SHARE YOUR GENTLE ACTIVISM

We’d love to hear about your gentle protests. Email us: thesimplethings@icebergpress.co.uk or leave your story in the comments below.

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Wellbeing | Why the Sea Makes you Happy

Why we really do like to be beside the seaside…

We’ve been exploring the health benefits of the sea for centuries, from bathing in its salty waters to breathing in the cleaner air of the coast. But the power of the sea to improve our wellbeing is so strong, you can actually reap the benefits without even rolling up your trouser legs and getting your feet wet. 

A recent study from the University of Exeter found that simply living near the sea had protective benefits against anxiety and depression, with those living close to the sea less likely to experience mental distress. However, that benefit was reversed if they moved inland. In fact, just looking at the sea and out to the skyline can have a positive effect on mental health. A 2015 study found that having a sea view could slow heart rate and increase happiness, and hearing the sound of waves has a similar effect. 

Of course, we’d all love nothing more than a permanent view of the changing sea from our windows, but if you’re a little land-locked, there are still plenty of ways to enjoy the benefits of the sea. On days where you can’t get to the water, here are some ways to bring it to you

Make a plant pot pond 

If digging a pond is out of the question, Helen Rook author of Urban Wild (Bloomsbury Wildlife) suggests this clever idea. Take a pot (preferably without holes). Fill with water, then add a couple of deep water and marginal plants (choose one for spread and one to cascade). Position out of direct sunlight and enjoy watching the wildlife it’ll attract.

Visualise the ocean

There are many guided meditations that use water as an aid for relaxation. Find one on a meditation app or simply sit for a while, close your eyes and imagine the sounds, smells and feel of your favourite watery environment. 

Have a soak in the bath

Oprah Winfrey is so keen on bathing – her ‘restorative escape’ and ‘ideas time’ – that she had a bathtub designed to fit her body. While that might be a bit ambitious, you can still benefit from the increased creativity, calm and ideas that come with a long soak.

Listen to the waves

The sound of water is very relaxing and can help you fall asleep, reduce stress and anxiety and clear your mind. You can find wave sounds on YouTube or next time you’re by the coast, record them so you can listen and picture yourself there again when you’re in need of a boost of vitamin sea. 

These ideas were taken from our July 2022 issue, in which Rebecca Frank wrote about Blue Space Thinking and why we are drawn to the water. The wonderful sea view pictured is by Marilyn Harrison. It’s just one of the rooms with a sea view that we featured in our My Place pages this month. 

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Appreciation | Why we love a bench

Alison McClintock remembers visits to a special bench outside her Grandmother’s house

Every summer as child I was packed off for a few weeks to Grandma’s. She lived in a weaver’s cottage just over a humpback bridge. Less than 20 miles from the town where I lived, to six-year-old me it may as well have been the other side of the world. 

Her TV showed programmes in black and white and was only switched on at the weekends for the wrestling and Songs of Praise. She didn’t have a car and there was no bus route. And apart from finding out what one flavour of crisps the local village shop was selling that week, the main source of entertainment was sitting on the bench outside the front of her house.

Sometimes we’d sit with a bucket of freshly-picked peas and broad beans between us, shelling them into a saucepan for supper. Most of the time we’d just watch the world go by, taking it in, on our own terms. Local farmers with tractors full of hay would offer a nod of acknowledgement as they bounced over the bridge. People would pass by on their evening constitutional, comment on the weather, maybe or maybe not say hello. Others would share news, alerting Grandma to recent deaths and births and marriages way before the parish magazine ever made it through the letterbox.

There was nothing special about that bench, but just by being there, and giving ourselves permission to pause and look out at the world, the world came to us. 

You probably pass by a bench or two every day, and if you don’t need it you won’t notice it; just an obstacle to skirt round, part of life’s furniture. But that ordinariness makes them extraordinary. Take a seat and see what happens. No minor miracles or feats of wonder, just the enjoyable everyday happening around you.

You don’t need any special skills to be good at sitting on a bench. There’s no age restriction or dress code. You can just sit where you’re at. Be yourself, by yourself for as long or as little as you want. Benches allow you to be sociable on your own terms. Unlike picnic tables, there’s no need to make eye contact on a bench. And you don’t have to ask permission to join someone already sitting on one because there’s enough personal space for each of you, to sit with your thoughts. 

Who needs social media when you can say hello to passing dog walkers? Why spend time unravelling the narratives of a weekly soap when you can watch the flickering embers of a teen romance, or the drama of gulls squabbling over their potential pickings? All of this comes without the need for screen or licence fee, in high definition and glorious technicolour, played out in real time, in real life.

And benches are not just a chance to see stories, they can be the story, with captions that give strangers a glimpse of a life well lived and that allow those that chose the dedication to access a bank of days spent with a loved one no longer present but whose presence is felt and remembered in that place. Along sea fronts, in shaded parks, on rolling hills around the country you’ll find benches etched with humour, longing, sadness and love. 

The above is taken from our feature ‘Benchmark’ by Alison McClintock, originally published in issue 110 of The Simple Things. If you’re an admirer of a good bench yourself, you may like to turn to page 110 of our June issue, where Lottie Storey has collated a few beautiful benches for our My Space feature, which this month visits benches in gardens. The one pictured here belongs to Imogen Woodage, @elm_terrace_interior. And if your garden is lacking in the bench department, turn to page 74 where we have a weekend project on making your very own bench. 

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Wellbeing | How to Get Up Early

Mornings are special in summer. Experiencing the dawn, or simply making the most of the quiet at this time to stretch or catch up on a book, starts your day on a positive note.

There’s something quite exciting about creeping out of bed and padding quietly about the house, guarding your precious time before anyone or anything can disturb you. Kerry Sutton is co-founder of Into the Wilds (intothewilds.co.uk) which organises group microadventures in the early morning and evening around the Bath area. “There’s something about being in the outside world when it’s waking up that’s really special,” she says. “All your senses are heightened because you haven’t yet been exposed to noise and stimulation – the grass and trees looks greener in the dew, the birdsong sounds louder and clearer, and you notice animals that you might not see at other times of the day.” Of course, you don’t need to go outside to enjoy the stillness and opportunity of the early morning. You could curl up in a chair and read a few chapters of a book by an open window, do some yoga or writing as the day slowly awakens. “By getting up early and having this time for yourself, you’re coming into the world and starting the day calmly and on your terms rather than launching straight into the demands of the day,” says Kerry.

How to get out of bed earlier

• Gradually bring your waking up time and going to bed time back by 15 minutes a day.

• Plan to do something you really enjoy and that you’ll want to wake up for.

• Sleep with your curtains open and allow the daylight to wake you naturally.

• Spend a night under canvas or in a hammock and wake up with the sunrise and dawn chorus.

• If you’re really tired, go back to sleep – no pressure!

These ideas are part of our feature ‘The Joy of the 5-9’ by Rebecca Frank, in our June issue. It’s all about making more of the daylight hours at the beginning and end of the day (5-9am and 5-9pm).

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More morning inspiration…

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Wellbeing | How To Hang Out

Hanging out is the new meeting up - and it’s good for your wellbeing, too. Here’s how to embrace an easier, unfussier way to connect.

Meeting with friends doesn’t need to require a committee meeting, weeks of planning and great expense. Rather than co-ordinated gatherings, try simply ‘hanging out’. Here are our favourite ideas for ways to hang out without making it a big deal.

1. Takeaway (or homemade) pizzas in the park. Everyone brings their own.

2. Coffee at your kitchen table while you unpack the weekly shop. 

3. A chat over the Sunday papers and a pot of tea.

4. Sharing a bag of chips on the beach.

5. A joint dog walk. 

6. A cuppa over the fence with a neighbour. 

7. Phone a friend while you cook dinner.

8. Invite someone over for a ‘leftovers’ supper.

9. Saturday morning video chat with someone long-distance. 

10. Watch your favourite TV programme with a mate. 

11. Get together to help someone declutter their wardrobe. 

12. Enjoy the sun in a friend’s garden. 

Our ways to hang out are inspired by our feature The Joy of Hanging Out by Frances Ambler in our May issue. You can find it on page 14.

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Listen | ENO Breathe calming playlist

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Just certain tracks can motivate you to run faster or exercise longer, in the same way, listening to calming music has been proven to decrease our levels of stress hormones. The ENO have a playlist precisely for this. Take a listen on Spotify here.

“These songs are a salve of song,” says Suzi Zumpe, “moments from operas chosen for their soothing, calming atmosphere.” Zumpe is the Creative Director of ENO Breathe, an online programme designed by the English National Opera in partnership with Imperial College Healthcare NHS Trust to tackle post-Covid breathlessness and associated anxiety. 

To find out more about how breathing in the right way can help you feel better, inside and out, see our feature ‘Let it go’ by Johanna Derry-Hall in the May issue of The Simple Things.

ENO Breathe – A calming playlist