Alternative funerals

Losing a loved one is never easy, but new ways to deal with death can help us find comfort after bereavement, some of which are explored on page 72 of February's The Simple Things. 

Alternative funerals

• Sacredstones.co.uk offers last resting places for ashes inspired by Bronze Age funeral barrows – a network of underground passages with candlelit niches set into the wall for urns – in Wiltshire and Cambridgeshire.
   
• The Natural Death Centre lists green burial sites throughout the UK, where trees and wild flowers mark resting places for bodies and ashes (naturaldeath.org.uk).
   
• DIY funerals are growing in popularity (there is no legal requirement to use a funeral service). For more information, see goodfuneralguide.co.uk, onlywithlove.co.uk and finalfling.com.
   
• Cardboard coffins are an environmentally friendly alternative to traditional versions, and can be customised with your own design or photograph. See creativecoffins.com.

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Listen | Spring cleaning songs

Put a spring in your step and a duster in your hand.

Listen to our spring cleaning playlist now.

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Competition | Win a VIP package to The Good Life Experience

A VIP package to The Good Life Experience is the prize up for grabs for the winning designer of our fifth patch

These are our four happiness patches. Each one is a visual reminder of the things that can help us find greater contentment – whether it’s being active, connecting with friends, learning something new or taking time to notice the little things.

Buy The Simple Things happiness patches

You can buy one, two, three or all four patches here – to keep or to give; spread the joy and share the fun.

Design our fifth patch

Our fifth patch – currently blank – is all about giving. Doing something nice for someone or getting involved in your community can make you feel good and help you to build strong relationships with those around you. So, how would you capture the art of giving in a patch? You have until 16 April to get creative! Our downloadable PDF has all the instructions you need to enter, including a patch template that shows you the exact size the finished patch will be.

The prize

The winning design will be turned into a sew-on patch. We’ll add it to our collection of patches to buy and give, and all the profits will go to charity. The lucky winner also gets a VIP package to The Good Life Experience festival in September, including festival tickets for four, camping accommodation and tickets to The Simple Things Picnic Feast. If you’re not lucky enough to win, or want to find out more, details and early bird tickets for The Good Life Experience are already on sale here.

The small print

The closing date for entering is 11.59pm on 16 April 2018. The winner will be chosen after this date from all complete entries emailed, and notified soon after. The prize includes four tickets to both The Good Life Experience and The Simple Things Picnic Feast, as well as festival accommodation in a four-person bell tent. The prize can’t be transferred or swapped for cash, and it doesn’t include travel costs – you’ll need to make your own way there and back. Oh, and the judges’ decision is final. You can find more terms and conditions here. Good luck!

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What I treasure | My Spode Mug

My mug has kept me company for almost a decade, gifted towards the end of a friendship that would inevitably decant, leaving only the gritty sediment swirling in the bottom, hard to digest. It’s a memento of the surreal; a whirlwind romance, a move across oceans, an incapacitating illness and a slow recovery as everything else fell apart. It’s a reminder of simple kindnesses, of which there were many, in a place without the familiar, a talisman from another life.
It’s been half empty and half full. It’s caught tears and echoed laughter. I’ve cradled it delicately and been tempted to hurl it at various things, even a few people. . . It’s seen me stripped bare; contorted by rejection and rage, wallowing in self pity. It’s been by my side as I’ve learned and evolved... matured.

It’s a mug I’d never have picked; the crockery is too thin, the pattern too old. It’s too refined for my raw edges; too British for my Antipodean routes. Inexplicably, I like it. But I treasure it because she gave it to me, one Christmas. Alexander McCall Smith taught me later that Spode could fuel an argument and feed a story, as I sat alone in an Edinburgh flat with my steaming mug in hand. You Brits sure do put a lot of heat into tea. Time has carved out many lines on us both; the handle now too cracked to house any hot liquids. And still it remains, home to a family of toothbrushes. It’s neglected and toothpaste splodged but never unloved.

As I write this, the mug shatters, as if guided by a force bigger than the tiny hands which clambered up and tried to ‘borrow’ it from the shelf. “It don’t matter, Mummy,” my toddler comforts me. And while my heart aches as I collect up all the pieces, I know he’s right. It is just a mug. I treasure it not for the pattern or the pottery.

I treasure it as a waymarker to memories. And they will come to me without this prop. All these things it held still exist, true memories are imbibed. The broken pieces bring a freedom to choose new possibilities, to make my own happiness. Maybe I’ll finally take that mosaic course I’ve wanted to do for years. Or maybe, just maybe, I’ll get in touch with the lady with the cracking smile and infectious laugh that once upon a time gifted me my beloved Spode mug.

We’d like to know what you treasure - whether it’s a sentimental artefact, a person, a place or something else. Tell us in 500 words what means a lot to you - email thesimplethings@icebergpress.co.uk

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The Comfort of Things | Grown up tableware

There are certain things in your home that are like old friends: they always cheer you up. This month we feel the love for grown-up tableware - turn to page 116 of February's The Simple Things.

This month's home quandary:

I love having friends over for meals and enjoy preparing and cooking the food but by the time the doorbell rings and they all pile in, the table is still bare. As a result, I throw plates and cutlery on it in a higgledy- piggledy fashion that looks nothing like those attractive overhead shots you see in magazines. How can I master table laying?

Table laying is actually a pretty straightforward business that should not daunt you. Unless you live in a stately home and have to wrestle with silverware, napery and cut glass, all you need to do is place a few plates and cutlery on the table in an orderly fashion. Dragoon another member of the household to carry out this task, preferably an hour or so before guests arrive, and it becomes even simpler. With a little supervision, children can lay a table as well as anybody, and often respond positively to being trusted with this grown-up task. You can swan in at the end to straighten napkins and make sure glasses are fingerprint-free.

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Recipe | Comforting little casseroles

Tender spiced meat topped with cheesy mash... What’s not to like?

Makes 4 portions
600g stewing beef, cubed
50g butter
Olive oil, for frying
3 onions, finely chopped
1 bottle of dark beer
2 tbsp white wine vinegar
1 tbsp wholegrain mustard
1⁄2 tsp ground ginger
1 bay leaf
1 thick slice of ginger loaf (about 50g)
1.25kg floury potatoes, peeled and cut into large chunks
150–200ml hot milk
50g butter
2 egg yolks
125g mature cheddar cheese, grated
Fresh nutmeg, for grating

1 Season the beef and set aside for 5 mins. Heat the butter and a splash of oil in a heavy-based pan and sear the meat for 3–5 mins, turning, until browned. You will need to do this
in batches. Remove with a slotted spoon and set aside.
2 Fry the onions in the same pan for 10 mins, until golden. Add the beer, vinegar, mustard, ground ginger and bay. Crumble in the ginger loaf and return the meat to the pan. Bring to the boil, cover and turn the heat down as low as you can. Cook for about 2 hrs, stirring occasionally, until the meat is tender. You might need to add more liquid, or reduce the liquid at the end.
3 Meanwhile, cook the potatoes in a large pan of salted boiling water for 20–25 mins. Drain and mash with the milk and butter. Mix in the yolks and half of the grated cheese, then season with salt, pepper and nutmeg to taste.
4 Season the meat to taste, and divide among 4 mini casserole dishes. Top with the mash and remaining cheese.
5 To eat at once, bake in an oven preheated to 200C/Fan 180C/400F for 10 mins, until the cheese has melted. For a crisp, golden crust, brown under the grill for the last few mins.

TO FREEZE AND REHEAT
Wrap, dish and all, in freezerproof clingfilm or put in freezer bags, and freeze for up to 2 months. Thaw, unwrap and reheat for 20–25 mins in an oven preheated to 200C/Fan 180C/400F. Reheat from frozen for 45–60 mins at the same temperature.

Turn to page 46 of February's The Simple Things for more meals for one. It does take time, but when you’re done, you’ll have a wealth of comfort food to squirrel away.

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Make | A three-hole pamphlet

Give the basics of bookmaking a try by crafting this nifty three-hole pamphlet.

You will need:
2 sheets A2 paper (it should be no thinner than 80gsm and no thicker than 130gsm, short-grain; standard printer paper is 80gsm)
Bone folder (londonbookarts.org)
Shoe knife (or an old butter knife can do the job)
1 sheet colourful or decorative A4 paper thicker than your text paper (no thinner than 100gsm and no thicker than 175gsm, short-grain)
Waste paper
Mechanical pencil
Metal ruler
Scalpel
Cutting mat
Scissors or shears
Awl
Bookbinding needle (ratchford.co.uk)
About 60cm of linen thread, 18/3 or 25/3 thickness (see the selection at londonbookarts.org)

• First make two sections from your A2 sheets of paper. Take one sheet and fold in half, short edge to short edge. Make sure the edges are exactly aligned, before making a sharp crease using your bone folder.
• Slit the paper two-thirds of the length along the fold using a shoe knife. This helps to avoid ‘crow’s feet’ or wrinkles from forming at the corners of the folds.
• Turn the folded sheet 90 degrees and fold the sheet a second time.
• As before, slit the sheet two thirds of the way using a shoe knife.
• Turn the folded sheet 90 degrees and fold the sheet a third time.
• Do not slit the sheet again. You now have an A5 16-page, or octavo, section.
• Repeat with second sheet of A2.
• Take your two octavo sections (16 pages each) and combine the two sections by inserting one inside of the centre fold of the other (step 1). This will give you a 32-page section. 
• Fold the A4 cover paper in half widthways, or short edge to short edge. Make sure the edges are exactly aligned before making a sharp crease using your bone folder (step 2).
• Make a sewing station template: take a piece of waste paper and cut to the same height as your pamphlet and roughly 60mm wide (step 3).
• Make three marks on the edge of the waste paper (step 4): one at the centre (find this by folding the sheet in half lengthwise) and two at either end, around 30mm in from the top and bottom. The sewing stations will be at these points.
• Place the section inside the folded cover (step 5).
• Lay the book on the work surface with the spine edge aligned to the edge of the work surface. Open the book to the centre fold and place the sewing station template along the fold. Using an awl or pricker, make holes at each of the sewing stations (step 6).
• With a needle and about 60cm of linen thread (or a length 2.5 to 3 times the height of the book), begin stitching the section from the centre hole, station B (see step 7).
• From the outside in, insert needle and thread at station B, leaving a tail end of approximately 3cm.
• Bring the needle out through the top hole, station C.
• Go along the spine and in again at station A, then out through central station B.
• Tie the two ends of thread together with a reef knot and trim any excess thread (step 8). Make sure that the two ends are on either side of the thread running from A to C, so that the knot is firmly in place.
• Once the book has been bound, close the book, place a sheet of waste paper over the spine and go over the spine with a bone folder. If desired, trim the book.

Extracted from Making Books by Simon Goode and Ira Yonemura (Pavilion).

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How to draw a realistic portrait

You may not be quick on the draw, but these suggestions will help you make your mark

Portraiture is hard, especially if you know the person – it’s easy to notice if the likeness isn’t spot on. Suffice to say, you won’t become Leonardo overnight, but if you want to improve your skills, using this process may be helpful...

• Forget what you think you know about the face. Don’t bother about the details initially – consider the whole head. Lightly sketch out the structure of the head first, using an H or HB pencil: focus on the areas where bones are nearest to the skin: that’s cheekbones, brow, forehead, chin and jawline.

• You could draw a very light line down the middle of the face to centre the nose, and another for the eyes so they don’t go wonky later.

• Shade in the shadows with a softer pencil (something like a 3B). Again, go lightly. You could take a photo and change the filter to black and white to help you work out where the shadows should be. Keep blending, using your finger or a smudging tool.

• Finally, add the details, such as the eyes and lips.

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How to breathe a bit better

Learn to fill your lungs more efficiently

Check yourself

• Put one hand on your chest, the other just below the ribcage.
• Take slow, deep breaths and see which hand moves the most.
• It should be the one on your ribcage – meaning you are using your diaphragm to breathe, rather than your chest. Chest breathing makes your body stressed.

Then practise

• Get comfy on a bed or chair, with loose clothing.
• Sigh out through your mouth – it’ll relax your shoulders and neck muscles.
• Take slow, gentle deep breaths down to the bottom of your lungs. Breathe in through the nose and out through the nose and mouth.
• Slow your breath down further, checking that your ribcage is still moving more than your chest.
• Aim to practise for five minutes each day. You can also use it to relax any time you get tense.

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How to be mindful

Mindfulness - learn the basics of this super-useful sanity saver

“In bringing your attention to the breath, you’re necessarily bringing your attention to the present moment,” says Zen master Julian Daizan Skinner, author of Practical Zen (Singing Dragon). He suggests you aim for 25 minutes, starting with less and building up to that if you need to.

1 Find a comfortable sitting position and create a firm triangular base for your body. You can sit cross-legged on the floor, with your bottom on a cushion so your hips tilt forward, keeping your spine straight, or sit upright on a chair with feet firmly planted on the floor.
2 Make it your intention to sit still, but if you need to move occasionally, that’s fine. Don’t force anything.
3 You can either shut your eyes or keep your eyes gently focused on the ground in front of you.
4 Slowly bring your awareness to your breathing. Don’t try to change it, just watch it. Notice where it is in your body and bring your attention there.
5 Mentally count your breaths. In-breath: one. Out-breath: two. And so on, up to ten. Then start again at one.
6 Thoughts, worries and memories are bound to arise and that’s fine. Just notice them. Allow every moment to be exactly as it is.

Turn to page 85 of February's The Simple Things for more on our Mindfulness special. 

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Recipe | Smoked parsnip soup

With a mug of soup to thaw the hands and warm pasties to tuck into, a winter walk on the beach can be a jolly affair

Root veg cooked over woody herbs make a great soup.

Smoked parsnip soup

Serves 4–6
4 tbsp uncooked rice (any kind)
10 sprigs of rosemary and/or thyme, plus extra to serve
1 cinnamon stick, broken
750g parsnips, topped and tailed but not peeled
1 onion, finely chopped
2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
750ml vegetable stock
2 apples, peeled, cored and chopped
250–500ml almond milk
Zest of 1 lemon, and a squeeze of juice
A pinch of mixed spice

1 Preheat oven to 200C/Fan 180C/400F. Line a heavy lidded casserole with two sheets of foil large enough to fully line the pot.
2 Tip the rice, herbs and cinnamon into the pot, arrange the parsnips on top and set over a high heat.
3 When the rice starts to smoke, add 2 tbsp of water, cover tightly with a lid and smoke the parsnips over a high heat for 10 mins. Transfer to the oven and cook for a further 20 mins or until the parsnips are tender.
4 Meanwhile, in a large pan, simmer the onion and garlic in the stock for 10–15 mins until tender.
5 Cool the cooked parsnips slightly, then either strip the skin off with your fingers or scrape it off with a teaspoon. Transfer the parsnips to a blender, add the apples and blitz, adding the stock a little at a time, until you have a smooth, thick purée.
6 Blend in as much almond milk as you like, until the soup is your preferred consistency and creaminess. Use milk or cream, if you prefer.
7 Add lemon zest, juice, mixed spice and seasoning, to taste. Warm through the soup just before serving, and finish with a sprinkling of fresh thyme and a grinding of black pepper.
  
Blow the cobwebs away with a bracing winter wander on the beach, fuelled en route by toe-warming fare - turn to page 26 of February's The Simple Things for more, including Apple & thyme soda bread scones, Kale & feta rolls, Fish pie pasties, Marmalade brownies and Chai coffee.
 

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Stars can't shine without darkness

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Tipple of the month | Pisco Sour

Raise a glass to Peru’s best export (apart from Paddington)

The South American brandy, pisco, made from muscat grapes, was said to have been first made into the famous cocktail by Victor Vaughen Morris, an American bartender working in Peru, in the early 20th century. The first Saturday of February is National Pisco Sour Day.

MAKE IT: pour a 1⁄2 measure of lime juice, 2 measures pisco, 1 tbsp beaten egg white into shaker with ice.
Add a dash of gomme syrup and a dash of angostura bitters.
Shake. Strain into glass.
Salud!

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Seasonal winter shots

Ginger tops the list of effective natural home remedies. Try these combinations to help settle upset tummies, soothe migraines and ward off viruses

To make: Peel and juice the ginger first, then feed the herb or spice through the juicer. Finally, juice the fruit.

Each of the following recipes makes one winter shot.
Asian Pear Drop: 2cm piece of ginger, 1⁄4 of a stick of lemongrass and half
a pear.
Sunshine Ginger: 2cm piece of ginger, 1 blood orange or 2 clementines and
a dusting of cinnamon.
Winter Ginger: 2cm slice of ginger, 1 apple and a drop of oregano essential oil.
Blushing Ginger: 2cm piece of ginger, 2 cardamom pods (feed whole through a juicer or grind the seeds and add later after juicing), 4cm piece of rhubarb and 1 small or 1⁄2 medium-sized beetroot. Solo Ginger: 2cm piece of ginger,
1⁄4 lemon (zest and all) and a dusting of cayenne pepper.
Persian Ginger: 2cm piece of ginger, 1 tbsp fresh rose petals or 1⁄4 tsp rosewater and 15 pitted cherries.

From Tonics & Teas by Rachel de Thample (Kyle Books).

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Floral delights to brighten up February

Awe-inspiring orchids

For an uplifting dose of warmth and colour head to Kew Gardens’ Thai-inspired orchid festival inside the Princess of Wales Conservatory. A magnificent display of orchids among the sights and sounds of Thailand provides a welcome reprieve from the British winter.
10 February–11 March.
kew.org

White carpet walks

Marvel at the first signs of spring during a snowdrop walk at Rode Hall, Cheshire. With around 70 varieties of this much-loved flower, it can’t fail to make you feel optimistic.
rodehall.co.uk

Early bloomers

If you want a glimpse of spring, look out for
the National Trust Valentine’s Day Flower Count. Last year, Saltram in Devon had the highest number of flowers on 14 February (176 blooms) for the second year running. Gardens in the South West are usually the furthest ahead in the UK.
nationaltrust.org.uk

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Life Skills | Furniture painting

Spend a day learning a new skill. Mindful and mind full (in a good way). Clare Gogerty joins an Annie Sloan workshop in Oxford

If you've ever attempted to paint a piece of furniture only to be disheartened by the laborious process of sanding, painting and waxing, the day you discover Annie Sloan Chalk Paint is a day of wonder. Developed nearly 30 years ago, it brushes onto surfaces including wood, leather, concrete and leather, with no need to sand or prime. Suddenly that tired old bedside table can be revitalised with just a coat of paint and a layer of wax.

You can develop your skills at an Annie Sloan workshop. I attended one run by Annie at her Oxford HQ, but her stockists in independent shops nationwide are all trained in her techniques and run their own. The morning was spent painting a wooden box with a neutral colour (Old White, in my case), letting it dry, then painting a thin coat of another colour on top (Paloma, a soft grey) and scrunching it off with newspaper. This process, known as frottage,
creates a two-tone marbled effect similar to rag rolling, and can be used on any surface, not just wood.

Colour theory was tackled in the afternoon, with Annie encouraging us to think of colours “like ingredients used in cooking”. She urged us to be brave with colour in our homes and, using her palette of 37 Chalk Paints, fabric swatches and an outline sketch of a room set, we created schemes for a living room and a kitchen/dining area. By the time I got home, no piece of furniture was safe from my brush.

To find your nearest Annie Sloan stockist and your nearest workshop, which also includes gilding and waxing, visit anniesloan.com.

 

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Birch Tree Wine

A tapped birch can give around 4 litres of sap over 24 hours (above). Fermented with lemon and raisins, it makes a lovely wine 

Birch tree wine

4 litres of birch sap (as fresh as possible - see the feature on page 36 of February's The Simple Things for how to tap a birch tree)
1kg sugar
200g raisins
Juice of 2 lemons
5g wine yeast (1 sachet)

You will need:
1 large bucket
2 x 4.5 litre demijohns with airlocks*
Sieve
Funnel
4 or 5 x 750ml bottles

1 Give everything a good scrub and sterilise with hot soapy water. Put the sap in a large pan and bring to the boil. Add the sugar and simmer for around 10 mins until the sugar dissolves. Pour into the sterilised bucket and add the raisins and lemon juice. Leave to cool.
2 ‘Activate’ the yeast according to the packet instructions and sprinkle into the bucket. Cover loosely with a cloth and leave to ferment for around 3 days at room temperature.
3 Strain out the raisins and decant into into one of the demijohns. Seal with an airlock. Leave upright in a warm, darkish place for around 4 weeks. Sediment will collect at the bottom of the jar.
4 Decant the liquid into the second demijohn without disturbing the sediment and seal again with an airlock. Discard the sediment. Leave upright in a warm, darkish place until fermentation is complete (when no more air bubbles rise into the airlock). This could take another 4 weeks.
5 Decant the liquid into your sterilised wine bottles, again without disturbing the sediment and seal. Discard the sediment.
6 Store the bottles on their sides in a cool place (if you’re using corks, make sure they’re tight!) and leave to ‘age’ for at least 3 months. Best after a year, if you can wait that long!
 
* For wine-making supplies, try homebrewcentre.co.uk or wilko.com.

Recipe by Kate Turner.
 

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A could-do list for February

Things you might want to do this month (no pressure!)

• A could-do list for February
• Eat syrupy pancakes for breakfast
• Read a short story in one go
• Wander around your local park
• Stop every two hours and focus on your breath
• Go out with friends (even when you don’t feel like it)
• Do your food shopping somewhere different
• Write down five things that recently made you smile

What would you add? Come over and tell us on Facebook or Twitter. 

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Things you could give up for Lent

Not planning on giving up chocolate for Lent? Try one of these ideas instead.

Plastic bottles

Carry your own drinking bottle and drink tap water.

News

It can provoke anxiety so give yourself a break every now and then.

Social media

Speak to those you care about and remain blissfully unaware of those you don’t.

Waste

Buy food locally and more frequently to avoid waste and get savvy with sell-by dates and leftovers.

Gossiping

It creates negative energy. If you haven’t got anything nice to say...

What would you add? What are you giving up? Come over and tell us on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter.

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Breathe | February cover reveal

Peek out from under the duvet. Yes, it’s still winter but there are signs of season’s end. It’s time to wrap up, get out there and blow off some cobwebs. A beach walk could work, a potter in the garden or a wander through the woods, all bare branches and new views. Dusk is still early, leaving a lamplit evening for a mindful project or making a meal of dinner for one. And when the dark night settles, come full circle back to your duvet. Sometimes love is nothing more than a warm bed, a hot drink and a good book. 

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